


Between you and I

by yamaneko19xx



Series: Losing control [7]
Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Cheating, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M, Ocelot's pov, POV First Person, Some hurt and kind of comfort, author is sorry, both are two liars
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-02
Updated: 2016-09-02
Packaged: 2018-08-12 14:55:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,253
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7938811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yamaneko19xx/pseuds/yamaneko19xx
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Everyone sees us as cat and dog, always fighting as if we hated each other. But... between you and I, Kaz, this is the truth."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Between you and I

**Author's Note:**

> This happens when I have to study for a kanji exam, my brain betrays me.  
> I just needed to get this out of my head. Hope you enjoy it! If I have time I'll write longer about this, or maybe not who knows.

**Between you and I**

 

It’s getting dark and the lights on Mother Base turn on while I wait for Big Boss to leave on the chopper for his next mission, it will take a couple of hours for him to arrive at the landing zone designated, I know because the time I can be with him is something precious.

Once I lose sight of the chopper I look at him. He’s standing next to me, as we always do when wishing the Boss good luck on his new assignment.

He looks at me with cold eyes, not even a smile and walks away. I watch him leave and take a different route, can’t help but glance at my iDroid every minute to see if Snake needs anything and I feel my heart beating faster.

On my way to my objective, I come across some recruits who either salute me or want to stop me to talk, but I don’t have time “maybe we can discuss this later, I have some business to attend.” I make a courtesy smile at them as I continue walking.

The adrenaline rush is always present, from the first time I did this, to this time, but I don’t care. I never did.

Yes, there was a time when I would feel guilty but my desire for the man I was going to meet was stronger. No one else in the world made me lose control like him.

No one.

  
I sneak past some guards and I enter his room. It’s dim light is enough for me to recognize the naked body of the blonde, his eyes gleaming and his skin almost shining at the weak light.

“Good night Miller.” I smile while I approach him, already uncomfortable as I feel my blood rushing to my cock.

“Ocelot, don’t keep me waiting.” Kaz tries to fix his hair but we both know it will be impossible, his hair will become messy as soon as I take him, and honestly, this is the sight I most love about him. Blushing, messy hair, aroused and waiting for me.

I unbutton my shirt as I lean one knee on the bed. Kaz gets anxious and kisses my belly as I’m revealing my chest, his left hand touching my ass.  
I throw my shirt to the floor and I watch him trying to unbuckle my belt, he’s so eager to have me. And I’m so eager to have him.

I take my iDroid from my pants’ pocket and check on Snake’s position. Still 3-4 hours to arrive… I sighed as I put it back its place and pull my pants down, giving Miller free access to pull down my underwear and start sucking me.

How did we end up doing this? I wasn’t sure how, but it seemed the little arrangement I had with Miller failed. These past 9 years we got involved, too involved in an addictive relationship and the only way for us to stop was when Big Boss woke up.

In John’s head, you, Kazuhira Miller are still his partner. Part of his strength and will were boosted by you, his second in command. I knew this already when I dared to kiss you for the first time. I told myself this was it, but later on I was taking you on that hotel room, biting you, possessing your body coming inside you. It was clear that we couldn’t be just business partners. The distance between us felt sometimes like an abyss, and it was impossible for us to be apart from one another.

But there are things greater than you and I. We both know it.

  
So far we’ve been playing our roles too well, no one, not even Snake suspected what happened between us.

Everyone sees us as cat and dog, always fighting as if we hated each other. But... between you and I, Kaz, this is the truth. This is what matters to me… this is what I think every time I see you smiling at him, when you kiss him or let him fuck you, between you and I, this is the truth. You, naked in your bed, waiting for me to come and take you, because you belong to _me_ and I belong to you.

  
Now you are here with me, not with him. And you’re sucking my cock like there is no tomorrow, humming and licking me like a dog in heat wanting to mate with me.

  
I grab his hair and push his head to my cock while I move my hips, slowly making him deepthroat me and _bozhe moi_ , what an expert you are, Kaz. I’ll never grow tired of this sight of you, closing your eyes, concentrating on relaxing your throat to push me even deeper.

But you open your eyes and watch my face. You like seeing me breaking down too, coming undone before you. Miller, I wonder if you are aware of the power you have over me. I can kill for you if ask me to (and you know I killed for you before and will gladly do it again), I will leave everything and everyone for you… even him… just... what are you making me think?

I grit my teeth and growl while he keeps on sucking me. I trained you, I forced you to do this to me so many times. I know that, I forced you at first. How can I forget it? After one of our fights we were both bruised and tired, I felt blood on my lips from the hit I received from you, but in the end I pushed you on your knees and made you suck my cock… I thought you would make me come just by watching your furious blue eyes challenging me, hating me and loving me at the same time.

This time, however, you look like a tamed dog and that can also make me come. To think that the salty commander is here, naked and giving me a blow job, so eager to please me, eyes full of lust, yes, you can make me come for sure.

If we didn’t have time for this, this would be as far as we’d go. I’d come inside your mouth and then I’d play with you a little before making you come, hearing your voice trembling and breaking down as you say my name. But there’s still time so I push you to the bed, kissing you deeply while I get on top of you.

“Fuck me”

Miller, you know you can ask anything you want from me when you say that, purring while our lips are still wet and linked by our saliva.

I grab the lube from the nightstand and I notice it’s not as I left it the last time we were together.

“Have you let Big Boss fuck you?” I ask curiously watching your face. We have a deal, you know it, I know it too. You had to be for Snake, for anything he wanted, you had to ...please him, you are the only one who can keep Big Boss’s mind in one piece and it had to continue being that way.

“I… We don’t have time for this.” Kaz touches my thigh while I’m still on top of his body.

“So you’ve been intimate with him.” I glare at you but you evade my eyes. I don’t know what to say…

“You know we did it one or two times but…”

Three times to be precise. I know because when you are with him I feel I’m gonna die.

“I should be surprised if you didn’t fuck at all. I see how he looks at you, it’s so obvious that he wants to have you. But it’s expected, huh? For you to be his bitch.” I shouldn’t have said it and I don’t know why I was so upset. I know that he loves me and not him, doesn’t he?

He looks pissed off, I can tell by his expression. And then he snaps and fights me, throws me away from his naked body and when I want to grab him he hits me on my face.

“He’s tender with me, you know? He didn’t hurt me and it was nice actually.”

Don’t break my heart Miller, don’t break it any longer. I can't fight, there’s no argument for me to win over him. “So you think I’m harsh with you?” I try my best for my voice not to falter.

“I never said that it’s just-”

I kiss him, first rough, then soft, tender. Our tongues caressing each other, moving slowly and exactly as we like. He puts his hand on the back of my neck and pulls me on top of him again. When I touch his face, I realize he’s crying.

“Kaz… I’m sorry…” I touched his face and silently cursed at myself. Knowing that I have to give him out to another man is an ordeal, even if that man is Big Boss. I was once in love with him too, and… Kaz is his partner… But I can’t help feeling broken hearted when I see them together.

“No, forgive me. Yes, he’s more tender than before and it seems he actually cares about me because he treats me too soft, as if I was made of crystal. Big Boss changed, he seems to have a heart now.” He talks softly, trying to make a confession. “We fucked, yes, but when I close my eyes I… Jesus Ocelot…”

When you close your eyes _what_ , Kaz? You imagine I’m the one inside you? That I’m the one caressing your skin softly while I tell you that I love you?

His hand travelled through my body and I was beginning to get aroused again, and impatient.

“The only one I want is you Adam.” Kaz looks at me, his eyes seem to spark just like some years ago when we were together, when no one could step between me and him, no distance between us.

“You have to stick to the plan Miller. Give him what he wants. I’m sure no one can resist your charm, not even Big Boss.” I brush my fingers through his swollen lips softly.

Am I being too cruel? Too cold?

Kaz evades my eyes and blushes. I know, you've just opened your heart to me and I sound as I don’t care. Inside I’m breaking, can’t you see? Are you the one who can break past my mask and see who I truly am?  
  
“I know. So far he hasn’t complained you know?” He smiles weakly while he tries to fight back the tears again.

“And who wouldn’t? You are a piece of art.” I smile back. “Let me show you that I can be tender too, only for you.”

I resume my work on him, putting lubed fingers on his entrance and slowly push them inside. He grabs my head and makes that face, faking it hurts but I know he wants more.

“Ocelot... I don't need you to be gentle with me.” There’s a tone of annoyance in his voice.

Of course, he likes it rough just like me. Though it’s not bad to share a tender moment sometimes. I don’t care how you want me Miller, just ask me to and I’ll do it.

If rough is how you want, you’ll have it. I turn him so that he faces his pillow and I grab his waist with one hand while I guide my cock with my other hand to penetrate him. He growls and grabs the pillow while I go harder on him, filling him completely, enjoying his warmth.

After some minutes he turns his head to meet my eyes and I stop, pulling out of him. He turns his body to face me, grabbing the back of my neck to push me into a kiss. Sloppy at first, heated and deep afterwards.

He spreads his legs and I resume my thrusts, both of us sweating and panting.

I don’t know if Big Boss comes inside him, I not that masochist to ask Miller about that but I do think he does. It’s obvious, a man like him gets everything he wants and possessing Kazuhira Miller is one of those things. Even though I adore you John, this man is mine. I’m only letting you think you have him.

 

 

* * *

 

  
The iDroid beeps, Pequod advises the deployment will take place in 15 minutes.

We are a mess... Still in bed we share more kisses, some deep, some quick and some just more bites than actual kisses.

“Y-you didn’t leave me any mark right?”

I get angry and grab his wrist, pin him to the mattress, my teeth on his neck biting him so hard that I can taste copper. He growls and complains, but his hand grinds my head to his neck, his fingers entangling my hair until his growls turn into moaning.

“Ocelot...” Miller presses his legs against my body, trapping me and at the same time telling me to stop.

“You’re mine, aren’t you Kaz?” I lick his blood slowly, sniffing his skin and wanting to remain locked with him like this forever.

You don't answer, you seem mad, but I don't care.

 

He will probably see the bite mark on your neck...  

I'm thrilled to know what excuse you come up with this time, but it won't matter really, because between you and I, Kaz, we know the truth.

 

**Author's Note:**

> bozhe moi: oh my god in Russian


End file.
